As we explore the territory that’s Venus in Aries, we do so with the understanding that Venus can’t be reduced or limited exclusively to “love” in one’s birth chart. There are far more associations which accompany the planet. However, for the purpose of this particular article, one’s idea of love, as viewed through the Venus in Aries lens, will be emphasized.
For those with Venus placed in Aries in the birth chart, love can be a battlefield, where you want to be number one with no question. Love can be a feeling of having to “fight ” for the object of your affection. Love is passionate involvement. Love is fiery. Love is independence. Love is victory. Love is risk.
Love is “shooting your shot”.
You have the potential to be the the “Love Warrior”.
Ideally, you have little problem being the initiator in forming relationships because (1) you don’t believe in wasting time and (2) there’s a dynamic thrust of identity projection at work. For you, personal relationships are a source of constant renewal, and the litmus test of the ones that serve you is how much motivation you feel to maintain them.
Independence is another key theme for you. Learning the lesson that: working in your own self-interest and selfishness are two different things will be of immense value to you in your journey.
When Archetypal Aries energy is present in intimate relationships, there’s a tremendous focus on impact: On the effect they’ve had on the other person. The continuous question is :”what’s new?”
A static existence without mutual independence is as debilitating as it gets.
The gist of an Aries infused relationship is: “take your resources and explore the world, and I’ll do the same.” Then, we’ll come back and share insights in a manner that benefits us personally and collectively.
In general, what you can provide and also what you expect from another, is a straightforward and shame-free manner of relating. Emotional directness doesn’t have to be a problem.Typically, this is a person who’s more concerned with affirmation of their being than apologizing for it.
Because of the focus on identity development, what the Ram seeks in a partner is someone who has found a source of passionate involvement and stimulation for *themselves*.
Venus in Aries understands that to be deeply focused on what you love is to feel connected to the collective life force.
On a healthy level, the Venus in Aries individual desires to “push” their partner to fulfill potential. Always looking for ways to encourage stretching out of their comfort zone.
Dysfunctionally, they become obsessed with competition, feeling as if they have to continuously be “one up” as a source of psychological satisfaction.
Another appropriate question for Venus in Aries is: “How do I keep the fires burning?”
Aries energy is undoubtedly challenged with maintaining enthusiasm in relationships. With the natural ebb and flow of life, the initial “heat” which is automatically present in the beginning stages of a union must subside or take on a different form.
So, what will it be?
Do you choose air to fan the flames of your passions? More fire to set the world ablaze? Water to create steam? Or, earth to bring structure to your aspirations?
Great astrology raises effective questions.
Ultimately, no matter what you choose, know that you can, and are supposed to have an impact on your partner.
You have the capability to become a master motivator and a source of “juice”. Not only by your powerful words, but your life lived as a personal demonstration of how an identity and belief in a cause unfolds over time.
Venus in Aries also suggests a person that’s not adverse to risk in relationships.
Now, we return to the theme of fearlessly going after the type of relationships which authentically suit your way of being: a.k.a.”shooting your shot”
Many years ago, I had the pleasure of coming across the work of Richard Idemon, an Astrologer who passed away in 1987. I picked up a copy of his book “Through The Looking Glass: A Search For The Self In The Mirror of Relationships.”
One of the first ideas which captured my attention was that of our most fundamental need in human relationships being the re-validation of our basic myths.
We all have a “story”, or mythology of sorts that we carry around with us. This basic psychic ground is a significant contributor to our sense of self. As a result, the patterns which we consciously or unconsciously create are those which are going to keep co-signing on our basic myth.
Those relationships which we may feel less comfortable, or even highly unsettled are those which challenge our basic ground.
However, if growth and evolution in relationships is what we truly seek, we must ultimately head in this direction.
There is an excellent example given in this book regarding the physical territory of animals, which can directly be applied to the psychic territory of human beings.
All animals have a basic physical territory that they will not deviate from. Even when chased by a larger, more fierce animal, which is sure to eat them alive, they will not leave this territory. In fact, the animal in question will run until he/she can’t run anymore and double back into the jaws of the pursuing animal rather than leave it’s comfort zone.
If we apply this same logic and scenario to our human relationships, we now see that most of us would rather be “eaten alive” psychically largely due to our need for safety. Pushing ourselves into the unknown constitutes a psychological death. So, in our discomfort, we resist change with all our might.
What we may have failed to realize is that we won’t be able to evolve into any relationship which does not support our existing myths.
If our mythology casts us as unlovable, undeserving, fearful human beings, our relationship patterns can’t reflect anything else. The only people that we’re able to accept into our worlds at this time are going to be continual confirmers of that reality.
Even if genuine love hit us head on like a Mack truck, we would not realize it, nor could we appreciate it because of our insistence to clinging to these outmoded patterns.
It’s only when we decide to renovate and expand our personal mythology that we’re able to open our universe to a broader array of possibilities.
There are two examples given of very different relationship models. The first model is the static model and the second is the erotic model.
With the static model, the basic intent is to stay safe. To avoid risk. As long as there are no major shake- ups, everything will be all right. “Mrs./Mr. Jones and I have been together for 30 years and everything is in it’s place just the way I like it.” However, the question remains: have you and Mrs./Mr. Jones really been together 30 years, or just one year 30 times over?
The erotic model is far more risky, but the potential rewards are much greater.
Having Venus in Aries natally, the erotic model of relationships is much better suited to your inclinations.
The question is: are you up for the challenge?
The prime goals of the erotic relationship model are: intimacy and growth, variety, openness to change, open communications, trust, varied and shifting roles, independence, and adult-adult relating. The author goes on to suggest that there are probably ten percent of people who have a sufficient amount of the erotic in their relationship to keep them on their toes; to have them aiming towards deep bonding and personal transformation. As you peruse this food for thought, it may help to take inventory of your personal relationships and ask yourself where you fall in the spectrum.
What are the primary goals of your relationships? What do the relationship patterns that you’ve attracted into your life say about your personal mythology and your basic ground? Do you wish to embark on the journey of changing your myth? If you’re not entirely happy in where you stand in this area, please understand that you can begin anew with a legend for yourself which reflects the highest possibilities for creating the types of relationships which will enhance the quality of your life and ultimately contribute to your personal satisfaction.
The shot is yours to take.
If you have Venus in Aries in your natal chart, your theme song is “Can’t Lose” by Elzhi. You can listen right here:
*Reference: “Through The Looking Glass: A Search For The Self In The Mirror of Relationships.” by Richard Idemon
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